Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince: A review

It seems that with every new Harry Potter film, the general quality of the acting, writing and general accuracy to the books goes down after each film. However, this isn't the case for the latest one, which follows the original book for about 30 seconds before resembling something a cross between Skins and Merlin (by which I mean the film's starring Sam Neill than the two series woth of FAIL on the screens of the BBC). Whilst watching the film I found the only thing holding my attention was the performances from Jim Broadbent (even though Brian Cox would have made a much better choice IMO), and Michael Gambon, the latter being ironic as this is the film where he DIES (if you're a Harry Potter fan and did not know this, the book's been out for over 5 years, so fuck you if you were too lazy to ask your parents to buy it for you when they're not ferrying fried chicken down to the basement where you live, cretins!). The actors as could be expected were about as entertaining to watch as Jeremy Kyle, especially Emma Watson, who aside from having a face like an angel is about as good at acting as our politians are at...politicing. Too much drama, not enough talent.

One thing that did irk me most however was the lack of accuracy towards the book. I mean, I know how difficult it is to turn a book into a film but where the fuck did the Death-Eaters (who themselves are about as intimdating as the wolf-people from Twilight) set fire to The Burrow in the book? The part where Harry was hitting on the waitress at the begining was too far from the book to be even in the film, and I honestly wouldn't be too surprised if the actors followed a script made by putting certain pages of the book and copies of Harry Potter fan-fics in through a paper shredder, then having them celotaped back together by Captain Hook. Seriously, have the scriptwriters not read the books? Where were all the other scenes with Tom Riddle during his transormation from creepy school-boy to someone resembling the current John Travolta? What happened to the Quidditch matches and the other aspects of the book that made it was it was?

The part at the end however will always live in my memory as the worst moment in Harry Potter ever. If you've been paying attention thus far you'll know what I mean, I'm on about the part where all the students and teachers raise their wands and make the sun come out, but I'll remember it, not for the shitty tribute to Micael Gambon's corpse, but mainly for the reactions of the audience. Somewhere in the cinema was a die-hard Dumbledore fangirl who started crying. My reaction was one of incredulity, and I was half tempted to rise from my seat and tell her 'Shut up or I'll give you something to cry about!'. Oh if only...

You might be surprised to learnt that I am actually looking forward to the next films, mainly because there's nothing that can be missed without completely buggering up the plot. Here's hoping that these next films will stay true to the books.

All the Best, Beard.